Andartu Timbuktu

Your Time Will Come

2011-11-10T11:42:00.001-08:00

Ronald hates McDonald's and you know why. Although boys his age found this fast-food joint as being 'cool', he thought otherwise.

Rania loves McDonald's and you know why. Which girl would not want to be hanging out at the coolest joint where the coolest 5 year-old boys are at?

Ronald likes Rania and you know why. She's the girl that every 5-year old boy wants to be with.

Since Ronald likes Rania so much he rides his bike to McDonald's everyday and hid behind the bushes and observed Rania. Everyone knows Ronald hates McDonald's.

Richard is Ronald's grandfather and often he caught Ronald snooping on Rania, but he kept quiet, and you know why. Everyone knows when one is in love.

Ronald saw that Rania loves Fillet-O-Fish and you know why. Because it's delicious.

Ronald decided to put his likes and hates aside finally, he bought a Fillet-O-Fish after his 10th time observing Rania eating her favorite item.

Ronald waited for Rania to come. When Rania arrived, Ronald, nervous, gave Rania his sweetest smile and attempt to hand her the Fillet-O-Fish. Rania shook her head, pushed Ronald and ran away.

Disappointed and heartbroken, Ronald rode off on his bicycle bringing the Fillet-O-Fish with him.

When he got home, Ronald gently handed the Fillet-O-Fish to his grandfather.

Guessing what might have happened, Richard smiled and took the Fillet-O-Fish in his hands, gave a manly hug to a tearing Ronald and said " My child, one day, one fine day my child, your time will come, and you know why. Just like this Fillet-O-Fish I've been wanting and waiting for you to buy".

YOUR TIME WILL COME.

Women These Days

2011-09-01T12:24:00.000-07:00

Woman 1: So what is it about this guy that you like so much?

Woman 2: He's good with kids, he's great with housework, and he knows how to make me awesome coffee...

Random Discoveries

2011-07-11T07:21:00.000-07:00

"I guess love is when though you are in a crowd, a party, or hanging around with a lot of hot people, you can't keep that one person's face out of your mind, and heart, and you wish that you were actually spending your time with that person instead. Disregarding the fact of whether or not that person would feel the same way about you or not- that's a different story altogether."

You will only have the courage to send a text such as the above to a person if you are really sure of your feelings towards him/her. See what staying up late can do to you. Wee hours of the morning reveals new discoveries. And unexpected courage.

MY GIRL, YOUR GIRL?

2011-05-01T14:20:00.001-07:00

So I met this girl once upon a time in a dance class and thought she was really hot.
Not only she was beautiful, she had a pleasant character. I was surprised she wasn't a snob. That was what made her hotter. I saw her once a week, and loved the way she danced. It's amazing how one girl could give you such motivation by just... being there.
After graduating, I never saw her again. I lost my 'antique' phone, so I've lost her number. Facebook was non-existent then and I forgot to take her Friendster ID. I doubt she even had one. Or maybe she had. The point is we've lost touch.

A few years later when I've stopped dancing, I met a guy. I was really attracted to this guy even though he wasn't the hottest guy I've ever had but I loved being around him. I laughed at his jokes, he teased mine. We could talk and tell each other everything. I was falling in love with him when we found out we liked the same girl. To make it worse, she was the love of his life. They actually dated. I felt a rush of jealousy going through my veins.

Now she's married to a man who lies to her. Only the guy and I know this. So sad. This guy I was seeing actually said that he'd definitely marry her if she got divorced or widowed.

There was a sudden silence. I didn't know whether I was jealous because he loved her so much or the fact that we both loved the same girl.

I think it was the latter.

Slam the Slang!

2011-03-07T18:41:00.000-08:00

Ye kew. U buat aper tew. N@k p3gi manew.

U jgn baLeyk Mal@m m@lam taw...

U dah mam...?

Me : Bahasa apa ni. Nak mam? Mam apa ? Mampus?

TRANSLATION : PUKE.

MERDEKA, MALAYSIA.

2010-08-30T15:27:00.000-07:00

This year I show my appreciation towards Malaysia's independence by:

1. Switching on my red-bulbed shell-shaped lamp.
2. Switching on the blue-bulbed chandelier.
3. Switching on my yellow bulbed down lights.
4. Lying down and looking at all the colored lights that represent the colors that make-up the Malaysian flag and finally staring at the white walls wondering when can we actually be truly independent and forward in our systems, culture, and thinking.

AHMAD-AGAIN.

2010-08-30T07:30:00.000-07:00

As I was spring-cleaning after a long period of procrastination, I found AHMAD again!
I've lost AHMAD not long after I found AHMAD AGAIN after it was lost for the first time.Or was it the second.
I gave up hope. I never thought I'd see AHMAD again.
I found AHMAD amongst other things which I have lost for quite some time.
I hope I shall never lose AHMAD again.

After Prayers

2010-08-29T21:30:00.000-07:00

I entered the room and found out that a paintball tournament was just about to begin. So without any prior notice, I became a part of your team. I had no time to be nervous as you immediately discussed strategy. My heart was fluttering but I appeared calm. We must win the game. I wanted to make you proud. There were so many people in the other team.
I couldn't remember whether we won or lost for the next thing I knew I was at a party wearing a deep purple dress.

There was a contest for those who were in purple but I did not participate. I remembered Patrick did. He was so confident. I did contemplate in trying for it when I saw a hot lady whom I thought looked rather familiar. I said hi to her and introduced myself and asked her whether she has done modeling before and whether she wanted to become a model. That was when a few other girls approached us and congratulated her and said they were proud to meet her in person. That's when I knew that she was this year's Miss Universe Malaysia 2010. No wonder she looked familiar. I felt stupid for a moment and slightly embarrassed but I covered it up well.
Plus, my mind was too occupied with something else. My paintball team leader.
Of course I knew him way before that paintball tournament.I was looking around the room wondering where he could be. Only to see my friend who's a Miss Universe Malaysia 2010 finalist approaching with a big beautiful smile and waving at me. She looked gorgeous in her shining gold top and jeans. Simple, yet elegant. She should have been Miss Universe Malaysia instead of snobby lady.

I said hi to her, kissed her cheeks and let her float with all the other pageants and friends, and then I left the room, seeing that you were nowhere to be found.
As I walked out of the room, I saw you getting into your silver-grey luxurious car. Not the latest model though, but still considered luxurious.
You drove off, and I followed.
I knew you saw me, because I saw you staring at me when you thought I wasn't looking as you drove past.

I followed you and we stopped at a school. I walked past the classrooms, and I saw you smiling and talking to a fair-skinned Chinese looking girl. You were both walking out of the school and you saw me. You were looking at me 'that same way' again.
As if your eyes are saying that you long to be with me, but you can't.

You left the school with her and drove off. I followed. Until you stopped your car at one of the old shop-houses. I peered through the window and I saw you sitting at what looked like an old 'kopitiam' table and stool. She asked you to wait for a while. I was waiting anxiously too. Then she came back, carrying what looked like a baby boy. I was shocked, surprised, and speechless. A million thoughts were racing in my mind. Is that your child? Did you have the child with her? Who is this girl to you? The baby must have been about 6 months old. You smiled when you saw him. You immediately carried the baby and sat him on the table.
He was fair and chubby, cute and adorable. Just like you. And her. Then you held his chubby hands.I felt slightly hurt for I'm wondering what secrets you have been keeping from everyone. Is he illegitimate? Your love- child?

And as if you could sense my presence, you turned your head behind. It was too late for me to run. You looked shocked, and you stared at me the same way you usually do. That longing look in your eyes, wanting to be with me. Sometimes it appears as if you are apologizing that you can't be with me for some reason.

And as usual, I woke up, feeling confused and wondering what is the meaning of all this.

DILEMMA

2010-08-05T09:23:00.000-07:00

Sometimes it's easier to have no choices to choose from because when you do, you're stuck at having to make a decision. And the hardest part is making a wise one. Then, you're in a dilemma.

Aku hidup kembali

2010-05-15T10:50:00.000-07:00

Semalam Ahmad hidup. Hari ini aku hidup. Aku hidup kembali. Tapi bukan kerana Ahmad.
Ahmad hanya pemangkin.Catalyst.Mungkin.
Mungkin Ahmad merupakan foreshadow of what made me alive today.
Fuyo aku cakap English siot.
Aku happy.

AHMAD

2010-05-13T09:21:00.000-07:00

I thought Ahmad died in March.
But suddenly I found Ahmad is still alive.In May.
It's confusing.
Perhaps Ahmad did not die. Perhaps Ahmad only slept.
If there were a book of answers, I would have dived for it .
I am still looking for the reason.
Ahmad.

Goodnight

2010-03-31T10:49:00.001-07:00

Welterusten.

Blind

2010-03-31T10:34:00.000-07:00

You have eyes, but you can't see.
Not because you're unable to, but you refuse.
You can, but you don't.
You can, but you won't.
And I can definitely not help thee.
For I tried to make you see
But you won't even let me
So my eyes cried tears of anger
My eyes cried tears of pain
Of disappointments
For I was sorry not for me
But for you the one who refuses to see
You, the one who chose to be blind
Yes, I feel sorry for thee.
Stay blind if you want
But please don't blame me,
For I did warn you I wanted you to see
But you want to stay blind
So don't put the blamin' on me.

The Day Ahmad Died

2010-03-02T09:34:00.000-08:00

Today, Ahmad died for real.

Cantik-cantik

2010-02-23T09:54:00.000-08:00

Malam itu habisnya lewat. Setelah selesai aku kembali memakai pakaian asalku. Baju tanah putih bermotifkan bunga abstrak berwarna hitam. Aku mengikat rambutku ketepi dengan gaya bersahaja. Kulihat wajahku didalam cermin dan senyum.Tanpa mencoletkan sebarang alat solek, ku keluar dari pintu dengan penuh konfiden. Aku menyandang beg hitam kulit berjenama Aigner dengan beg kertas free yang bakal ku buang kerana melekit dek madu yang tertumpah dalam perjalanan tadi. Madu manis sedap kubeli sebagai ubat keronkongku yang menderita kerana infeksi virus batuk, dijangkiti dari abahku yang genius.
Ku rasa something dalam hatiku sejak dari tadi. Seolah-olah ada yang sedang menungguku. Mungkin seseorang yang ada sedikit menyukai aku, atau seseorang yang aku idam-idamkan sejak aku tahu kewujudan dia di muka bumi ini? Lalu seperti biasa mindaku khayal dalam anganan yang mengalahkan si Mat Jenin. Sambil aku melangkah tapak demi tapak menuju ke keretaku yang tercinta, hatiku berdebar- debar. Syok sendiri seketika sebab memakai pakaian cantik-cantik. Aku menghidupkan enjin keretaku dan memandu ke arah jalan pulang. Setiap perjalanan pulang ke rumah, akanku lalu satu tempat ini.Wajib lalu sebab memang ke arah jalan pulang ke rumah.Ayat tadi macam redundant tapi memang itu maksud aku. Stress point. Aku terus memandu dan aku hampir tiba di tempat itu. Hatiku berdebar-debar hanya Tuhan saja yang tahu. Sreeeeeeet aku break perlahan-lahan. Dia ada. Hatiku berdebar-debar. Aku berfikir dengan pantas dan menekan pedal minyak dan terus pulang, dalam keadaan berpakaian cantik-cantik. Bukan takut. Tapi malas.Balik rumah lagi best.

Book

2010-02-19T10:56:00.000-08:00

I am now a book.

Because I am readable.

Says someone who is not me.

WOW.

I'm impressed.

FANTASI BULAN MADU

2010-02-19T10:47:00.000-08:00

Malam itu aku TERjumpa nama ibu mertuaku di dalam sebuah catatan oleh bakal adik ipar aku.

Kemudian aku naik kapal. Kapal besar, kapal kayu. Seperti biasa, aku terpaksa melompat ke atas kapal tersebut, di mana kalau tersilap langkah, aku akan jatuh ke dalam laut yang sangat dalam. Dan seperti biasa, aku berjaya.

Aku menaiki kapal bersama keluargaku, yang jelas mama, abah dan adik perempuanku berada denganku.

Air laut warna coklat, hijau lumut, warna tanah.

Lama sungguh di atas kapal.

Kemudian aku jumpa gambar ibu mertuaku.

Dan kemudian aku...

PANIK.

*%^&^%!@#$%

2010-02-19T10:27:00.000-08:00

This is a special dedication to:

1. You, on that motorbike, who tried to do a U-TURN on the road where every car was going fast, and so was I. If I decided to knock you down, you could have died, or worse, you'd be alive but deformed.

2. All the bossy women around me who feel that they are perfect.

3. The pimple that has no better time to emerge than now.

4. The sore throat and fever that has to come during the critical period of a Musical Production.

5. The ******* who stole my *****.

Oh Oh!

2010-02-19T10:19:00.000-08:00

You really want something. You really really really WANT that something.
And then, you go,

Oh Oh!

Then, you're not sure whether you really want that something.

Oh Oh!

Antiques and Cars

2010-02-15T11:33:00.000-08:00

Many love the new.
I love the old.
For many reasons.
Hence I can't sleep.

The old has a history.
It has gone through many experiences.
It has a story.
It is tougher.

The designs are classier.
Unique.
It has attitude.
It has character.

Womanizer Womanizer!

2010-02-15T11:26:00.000-08:00

Dear best friend,

It was late and I couldn't sleep and
I remembered of what happened
To us, to you, the past
That we had in common.

Tonight, after seeing what I saw
That he did not change
I'm glad you did
And moved on.

It was the best thing that could have ever happened to you.

Normadiah

2010-02-10T09:15:00.000-08:00

Have you noticed that local artistes are only appreciated/remembered once they are dead?

This weekend, PETRONAS Performing Arts group will showcase several numbers which was popularized by the late Normadiah, and specially re-arranged by the talented musicians of PETRONAS Performing Arts Group.

Imbauan 2 by PETRONAS Performing Arts will be featuring Azlina Aziz and Liza Aziz, daughters of the late artist. Along with the talented sisters, PPAG will also be featuring Musly Ramlee who starred as P.Ramlee in the second P.Ramlee The Musical at Istana Budaya in 2008.

Q. Who is Normadiah?
A. Norma binti Abdullah was born in Manado, Sulawesi, Indonesia. She was acting with P.Ramlee a lot. Not only she can act and sing, she was also a choreographer. The song 'Sri Dewi Malam' was originally sung and popularized by Normadiah. She had 2 daughters Azlina and Liza during her marriage with Aziz Jaafar who was a fellow artist himself.

Q. Is that her real name?
A. No. Her name was Edith Sumampouw,and she converted to Islam at the age of 18 years old.
It was A.R Tompel who named her Normadiah.

Q. Why are they doing her songs?
A. To appreciate those who were talented but somewhat forgotten.

Come watch the show.
IMBAUAN 2.
DEWAN FILHARMONIK PETRONAS
TWIN TOWERS
13th- 14th FEB 2010.

For tickets and info, please visit:

www.dfp.com.my or
www.mpo.com.my

For more info on Normadiah, just google or wiki her.

Goodnight.

p/s : Don't forget to spot the Assistant Stage Manager for both nights. A little bird told me that she's hot.

Yin and Yang

2010-02-04T09:41:00.001-08:00

When I am Yin, you are Yang.
When I am Yang, you are Yin.

Sometimes I wonder whether you do that on purpose merely for your own pleasure and satisfaction.

The thing is, you are never Yang.
You are always Yin.

And knowing you who is always being a Yin to me, would respond to me and say that you are Yang after reading the statement above.

I becchaa!!!

The Subconcious

2010-02-04T09:35:00.000-08:00

One night, a girl who is currently PMSing and bloating like a frog was asleep, and dreamed of 2 things:

1. Happily hugging a new boss
2. An eye-candy sour-plum's girlfriend.

And she woke up wondering what it meant.

1. She should change jobs?
2. That she should forget about eye-candy sour plum?

Or

1. Quit her current job.
2. That eye-candy sour plum is on his way...

Rentung

2010-02-02T09:15:00.000-08:00

I was going in when I heard the voice.

Louder and louder it became.

I looked around and searched for where it came from.

And then I found it, screaming at me this time.

I picked it up, examined her carefully.

It was worth keeping, thus I bathed it and

I think IT is actually a she.

IT is Rentung.

Sexist

2010-02-02T09:13:00.000-08:00

It's hard to be sexist when you actually love the fact that GOD created the opposite sex for whatever reasons.

And yet I am.

A sexist. A feminist.

If I could

2010-01-18T08:23:00.000-08:00

If I could:

I want to know

the truth behind the mysteries of The Bermuda Triangle,

why GogMagog and Dajjal will appear,

how they really look like,

whether Christ (Nabi Isa a.s) will return,

where's GogMagog geographical location,

how Prophet Muhammad look like,

and so much more.

Same = same

2010-01-18T08:22:00.000-08:00

Our only difference is gender.

The Sign

2010-01-16T10:24:00.000-08:00

How could I have not noticed.

The sign has been in the house for quite some time already.

Ahmad. Ahmad? Ahmad :)

Ahmad is not human.

LOLROTFL.

Dushummm!!!

2009-12-30T06:47:00.000-08:00

Bang boom bash bash boom bang spank dushummm!!!

Thank you. I appreciate it very much.

Adrenaline. Hungry. Syabas, anda berjaya.

You know who you are.

The Shrew by Beirut

2009-12-29T12:52:00.000-08:00

Ku tak sangka lagu yang didengari sepupuku yang cool dan sexy itu merupakan lagu tema yang sesuai banget dengan kejadian itu, kematian aku.

Rintihan si Pontianak

2009-12-29T12:38:00.000-08:00

Mengilai.Kuat. Ketika setelah mengerjakan Solat Isya' jam 4 pagi.

Mengilai dengan lebih kuat. Jerit. Jeriiiiiiit. Menjerit setelah terbaca.

Pedih.Bagaikan dihiris-hiris dengan pisau yang amat tajam.

Dalam.Sakit.Dalam.Arghhhhhhhh.

Aduh.

Kak Ponti lari bertempiaran tanpa hala tuju.

Astrology?

2009-12-28T10:54:00.001-08:00

I came across this while surfing the net:

Famous Couples: Paul McCartney (Gemini) and Linda McCartney (Libra); Eric Stolz (Libra) and Ally Sheedy (Gemini); Isadora Duncan (Gemini) and Sergei Esenin (Libra); Stevie Nicks (Gemini) and Lyndsay Buckingham (Libra); Marilyn Monroe (Gemini) and Arthur Miller (Libra).

I'm a Gemini. If I were to refer to this, looks like a Libran partner would do me good.

I should produce a new reality show, Libran Lookout.

Whatever.

Night Babbles

2009-12-28T10:03:00.000-08:00

Mother Mary was up all night looking for Little Bo-Peep only to came across Sensual Saint stealing a Cherry Pop while jumping over the Wild Cat.

Mak Aku Cakap, Bapak Aku Cakap, Kawan Aku Cakap

2009-12-22T12:19:00.000-08:00

Mak aku cakap, jangan kejar orang yang tak suka kita, tapi pilih orang yang suka kita.

Tapi aku cakap kat mak aku, kalau aku tak suka orang tu, macam mana aku nak pilih dia?

Aku selalu cakap kat mak aku, aku ada suka satu mamat ni. Aku tanya mak aku macam mana aku nak tackle dia. Mak aku cakap, mak aku pun takde idea. Tu sebab dia cakap kat aku ayat yang kat atas tadi.

Disebabkan aku tak puas hati dengan apa yang mak aku cakap, aku cuba tanya bapak aku pula.

Aku tanya bapak aku, macam mana aku nak tackle mamat yang aku suka tu. Disebabkan mamat tu sikit-sikit ada macam 'character' bapak aku, so aku pun 'excited' la nak dengar jawapan dia.

Tapi bapak aku bagi jawapan yang pelik dan bagi aku tidak masuk akal. Aku bingung.

Mak aku cakap lain, bapak aku cakap lain. Ada ke bapak aku suruh aku pegi high-school reunion dia. Ish, tak logic. Aku bukan dari sekolah tu. Takkan la tiba-tiba je nak pegi. I got face-

lah.

Setelah beberapa bulan aku bingung, lalu aku pun bertanya kepada kawan aku. Kawan aku cakap, kalau aku suka mamat tu, aku patut beritahu dia. Aku cakap kat kawan aku "Gila!". Kawan aku cakap what have I got to lose. Paling-paling if end up mamat tu tak suka aku, at least I will get the answer. Daripada aku simpan dalam hati macam ni dan tak buat apa-apa about it.

Aku rasa ada logiknya cakap kawan aku tu. Hmmm.

Jadi cakap siapakah yang aku patut dengar dan ikot ni?

Cakap mak aku ke, cakap bapak aku ke, cakap kawan aku?

Love- Murder Episode

2009-12-15T08:37:00.000-08:00

It was late, it was dark, I was driving back home, looking forward to make love to my dad's Mac.

And suddenly I saw them. My heart was beating fast.

Oh my GOD! There was a male, and there was a female, in the dark, I think they were trying to make love.

Staring at each other they were almost still, only some parts of them were moving.

I looked at them, hoping that they wouldn't notice.

I was nervous for a slight moment, not knowing what to do.

Finally I decided to take a left and stopped my car.

Figured I will not be able to drive in sanity if I don't, I do not want to get into an accident.

I just had to do what I had to do.

I can't stand looking at them. My heart was racing like a speed bullet.

I made up my mind.

It's their lives or mine.

Pssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssstttttttttttttt. I pressed the spray long and hard and suffocated them in my car.

I will NOT let them produce anymore generations. I'm mean? I don't care.

I shall not park near the bushes again.

To hell with them cockroaches.

Teeth

2009-12-13T22:00:00.001-08:00

I love to see nice teeth.

I love brushing my teeth.

I love toothpaste.

Parrallel Lives

2009-12-13T21:43:00.000-08:00

Could it be possible that there is another form of you in another gender, race, or age?

That you are thinking of something and another person is thinking about it too?

Could it be possible while I'm eating cold leftovers pizza from the fridge without brushing my teeth beforehand simply because I just wokeup and I was plain lazy and the fact that cold leftover pizza's from the fridge tastes better without the minty taste of toothpaste after a morning brush, another guy could be doing the same thing at the exact same time in a different part of the world with the exact similar setting and eating the same flavored leftover pizza of the same size and chewing and biting it at the same time I was chewing it.

Could it be possible that while you are subconciously thinking about a particular person who do not have any close connections with you, he/she is subconciously thinking about you too?

Could it be possible that while you are reading your favorite star's (say Johnny Depp's) blog, he probably loves reading your blog too?

Could it be you are leading parrallel lives with this other person?

Or could it just be a coiincidence?

Hmm.

Stolen Wedding Basket(s)

2009-12-13T21:28:00.000-08:00

Hosting a wedding.

The beautiful basket is not meant to be a souvenier.

We will be using it again for another reception.

The aunty took out the contents of the beautiful basket.

Took a bouquet of flower decor from the dining table.

Stuffs it in the beautiful basket.

Opens the car door and lightfully asks me "I'm taking this home ok?"

Before I could even open my lipsticked painted lips to say " I'm sorry no, we're going to use it this week", she slams the car door shut.

Shit, mom's not going to be happy about this.

I told mom.

Family. Some are just, peculiar.

My mom peeked at the car window.

" They took two..." and made a funny face.

And we decided to just let it go.

By the way, the aunty spoke Malay with a strong Javanese accent.

Mind vs Emotions

2009-12-13T21:24:00.000-08:00

It's not easy.

Trust me.

I'm Sorry

2009-12-09T11:58:00.001-08:00

I'm sorry I didn't sprinkle rainbows and candies the way you hope I would

I'm sorry for I can't be the person that you say that I should

I'm sorry if my reactions were truly uncalled for

I'm sorry I reacted to the things about you that I don't adore.

I'm sorry I love seatbelts because I do care

I'm sorry if my silence is something you couldn't bear

I'm sorry if you think that I cheated and lied

I'm sorry for I didn't, honest, I have nothing to hide.

I'm sorry that you always think I'm ridiculous,

I'm sorry that sometimes I am sincerely clueless,

I'm sorry that you hate the fact that I phase out often,

I'm sorry that's just my nature, forgive me, amen.

I'm sorry if you think I have OCD,

I'm sorry you're no shrink no doctor no phD,

I'm sorry I'm normal though you don't think so of me,

I'm sorry if I'm unique or normal, just let me be.

I'm sorry I did try as hard as I could

I'm sorry I gave it chances like I normally would

I'm sorry for I think that now I really can't

I'm sorry for I think there is no more chance.

I'm sorry but this may really be tough

I'm sorry if I appear or sound to be rough

I'm sorry for not ending this with a laugh

I'm sorry but for me enough is enough.

High School Crush

2009-12-07T07:09:00.000-08:00

It's always a great feeling to like a certain someone the way you liked your high-school crush.

You tend to get nervous whenever he/she's around...

If you were hungry and stuffing your face like a pig but your hunger disappears when he/shows up suddenly...

You constantly think of him/her even during the utmost ridiculous moments...

You feel that there is hope that one day you will be with him/her even though he/she is currently taken by some obnoxious gf/bf... (the word obnoxious used out of spite)

His/her absence drive you nuts...

You breakout in regular daydreams of yourself with him/her...

You find yourself unconciously stalking his/her class/friendster/myspace/facebook/web page or anything which is somehow directly or indirectly connected to them...

Your heart drops when he/she smiles at you what more if they were to utter even a single word as simple as a 'hi'...

And you wish they knew how you feel about them...

I guess it's the adrenaline rush is what you actually miss.

Adrenaline junkie?

Peace

2009-12-07T07:04:00.000-08:00

There are those days, those certain moments, when you've had an overwhelming week, when you've been running around like a slave, trying to satisfy everyone...

and their voices in your ears, in your head, seems too noisy...

and you can't take it anymore...

and your blood pressure is rising and your head feel like bursting...

you feel like you want to scream...

SHUT UP EVERYONE, YOU Motherf***ers!!!

And then silence as if you've shot them all dead with a bazooka and finally

PEACE. (at last)

Them Lil Things

2009-11-30T07:28:00.000-08:00

1. Notices that you're not eating / your food has not arrived.

2. Voluntarily put some food on your plate.

3. Put some food on your plate when you needed help.

4. Educate you new things without being a show-off.

5. Replies your sms.

6. Returns your calls.

7. Nerd flirts.

8. Voluntarily help to carry your things.

9. Doesn't impose.

10. Loyal.

11. Smoke the ciggies that you can tolerate.

12. Use seatbelts.

13. Team player.

14. Prays.

15. Non-alcoholic.

16. Listens.

17. Ability to communicate.

18. Respects your space.

19. Respects that you have your opinion and decision.

20. Respect and get along with your family.

21. Agrees to disagree.

22. Loves you for who you are.

23. Reasonable PDA.

24. Peaceful.

25. Understanding.

26. Performing Arts.

27. Reads.

28. Realistic.

29. Fantasy.

30. Gym, sports.

31. Generous.

32. Caring.

33. Writes. (bonus)

34. Excellent with numbers.

35. Bedtastic.

36. Honest.

37. Non cheater.

38. Positive energy.

39. Loving.

40. Will be with you through thick and thin.

And the list goes on...

Nerd Flirts

2009-11-29T08:08:00.000-08:00

Nerd flirts.

Ahhhh.

Reconnected Goodbye

2009-11-26T10:52:00.000-08:00

Hilang, senyap, sepi.

Hilang senyap sepi hingga lupa.

Bukan sengaja, terlupa.

Siapa suruh hilang, kan sudah terlupa.

Maaf.

Masuk.Tiba-tiba.Fikir.

Siapa, siapa?

Terdetik, tergamam.

Terkejut, tergamam.

Tidak!

Hubungi, tolong angkat.

Angkat.

Komunikasi bermula.

Seperti dahulu, lebih ceria.

Tiada beza, cuma

Selamat tinggal,

Asalkan bahagia.

Ku akan bahagia.

*Sigh*

Reconnected, Goodbye.

You don't want?

2009-11-26T10:39:00.000-08:00

Says a foreign man in his 40s to a young man in his late 20s somewhere in KL

" What is she doing. Why you don't want her?"

Says the young man " Err..she's my friend"

Says the matured man " You don't want her?"

Young man grins.." err hahahehehuuu *speechless*"

Man in his 40s "You don't want her, I want her."

Says the girl to her friend in his late 20s " *Speechless* Ok ok let's get out of here. What the hell...!"

The question:

a)Where do you think this conversation took place in KL?

b) What exactly was the activity while the conversation was taking place?

*Susahnya nak obtain something kan?*

Stopped

2009-11-22T10:23:00.001-08:00

My heart stopped.

Fate, destiny, or Luck?

2009-11-04T10:32:00.000-08:00

"Chase thy not, be still.
Love will come, it will.
Chase thy not, be still.
As love betides when still.
Believe thyself,you must.
Differentiate between love and lust.
Chase thy not, be still.
Love will come, it will."

By: Andartu Timbuktu

-Copyrights of Andartu Timbuktu-

Choices

2009-09-26T12:24:00.000-07:00

No choice.

Spoilt for choice.

Making the right choice.

A Gush of Wind

2009-09-22T09:16:00.001-07:00

A gush of wind.

Ahah.

And Then....?

2009-09-22T09:09:00.000-07:00

Serabut.

Study.

Analyze.

Found.

And then......?

U.M.L

2009-09-20T22:44:00.001-07:00

It was wonderful to have been defined as a U.M.L.

Chronology of Reasons

2009-09-20T22:25:00.000-07:00

To have lost trust in a loved one, only to discover your own self

To have lost a loved one, only to find others who can love you

To have lost a friend as a sister, only to reunite with a long lost childhood bestfriend

To have frustrations at work, only to discover the crave for higher education and other career options

To have been criticized for eccentric ideas, only to be given the belief by a mentor that the ideas are acceptable

To have encountered new acquaintances, only to force you to think and make wise decisions

To have perserverance, only to achieve the ultimate dream.

To have. To live. To life. To everything.

Escapism - Infedility

2009-09-04T22:29:00.000-07:00

I finally understand men' s concept of escapism, not that I totally agree with it, but I understand.

I was in a meeting last Thursday, and that's when I realized that I'm doing it, what a lot of men do, especially married men.

I begin to understand why they just 'agree' with their wives, even though they disagree, and I begin to understand why 'unhappy' men resort to infidelity.

Please understand that I am not saying that infidelity is right, and I definitely am NOT a big fan of infidelity in relationships and marriages but I'm beginning to understand why some people do it.

Husbands agree to their wives just to keep the peace and harmony, to avoid further conflicts.

They adopt the ' The wife is always right' ideology.

Husbands tend to phase out when they are with their wives, if they are unhappy, wishing that they are somewhere else.

Unhappy husbands tend to find excitement 'out of the house' to escape reality.

This process often lead to infidelity for some, and the next thing they know, they are cheating on their wives.

In my case:

Me= Husband ; Work/Meetings/Bosses = Wife

Last Thursday I was doing it. I didn't realize it at first, and then it hit me. I'm a cheating husband! I'm cheating on my wife.

I don't cheat on relationships but I'm cheating on my work.

Guess I'm probably just as bad.

KEMBARA

2009-08-23T12:36:00.000-07:00

Seorang pengembara wanita sedang mengembara.(duhh)

Pengembara mempunya objektif utama iaitu mencari sesuatu yang telah lama dia mencari.

Tetapi apabila ditanya apakah yang dicari, pengembara tersebut gagal memberi jawapan yang tepat.

Jadi, apakah yang dicari?

Sebuah kitab memberi nasihat, bahawa sekiranya mencari seseorang (musuh, rakan, kawan, kenalan etc. etc.) adalah perlu kita mengenali diri kita sendiri dahulu. Mengenali apakah ciri-ciri kita dari semua aspek, adakah kita mengenali diri kita?

Most of the time, we fail to answer precisely. We tend to give very ambiguous answers.

So the essence of the book is that, only find someone we would love forever,and we can only do that when we have learnt and understood who we really are.

Pengembara wanita tersentak, lalu menghentikan pengembaraan.

Pengembara wanita berfikir selama 3 saat, lalu berpatah balik, ingin pulang.

Pengembara wanita pulang ke rumah dan mengambil kitab tersebut dari almari tingkat ketiga dan cuba mengenali diri sendiri.

And she thought she knew herself very well. Maybe she's wrong.

BOOKWORM

2009-08-23T12:25:00.000-07:00

Some worms are found in fruits, some in soil.

Some worms are found in stale food, some worms are found in corpse.

Some worms are found in books.

Some 'blondes' have found their long lost side of being bookworms.

Some of those blondes were not even born blonde.

Maybe it's not even many blondes, maybe it's A blonde. One. Like Uno.

But because she still looks blonde (it could even be a he), people tend to underestimate her (or it could be a him).

It's ok to be a bookworm. And look blonde at the same time.

Bookworm = ulat buku (in Malay)

BINGO!

2009-08-23T08:58:00.000-07:00

You see. You observe. Wait a minute, wait a minute. It looks familiar. It sounds familiar. Then you observe again. Just to make sure. Your brain automatically starts analyzing the bits and pieces of information. Your brain sends signals to your heart. Your heart starts pumping, slowly, and then it began to pump faster and faster sending the blood running through your veins in a peculiar manner, in a speed that it has never been flowing before.

Then everything stops. Your brain sends positive signals, positive waves, making you shiver and then..finally..

BINGO!

It's definite. You are convinced that you've found it. The missing piece.

And then your indecisive self, is unsure again.

Wait arr..BINGO or NOT..?Aiyaaa...

Forbidden Fruit

2009-08-23T08:51:00.000-07:00

Why does the forbidden fruit seem more appetizing, delicious, interesting, irresitable?

Were they made to be forbidden on purpose? Just to make it more exciting? So that it increases our level of curiosity?

Just to create some kind of thrill?

I want that forbidden fruit.

Beku- Frozen

2009-08-23T07:17:00.000-07:00

It's like I'm frozen. I don't know what to do. What steps should I take to make it happen?

I need to defrost.

Bodoh

2009-08-23T07:06:00.001-07:00

After a certain age, there are times when you suddenly feel stupid, or Jadi Bodoh.

The things you were so good at, and the skills that you sharpened, been sharpening..became so sharp..that you suddenly don't know what to do, you don't know how to act, or react.

Apsal la aku jadi bodoh tiba-tiba ni. What should I do?

DON'T!

2009-08-17T07:03:00.000-07:00

Don't do this, Don't do that

Don't wear this, Don't wear that

Don't say no, Don't object

Don't refuse, Don't speak up

Don't, Don't, Don't

Too many Don'ts these days.

My answer : DON'T BOTHER lah.

When it happens slowly inside you

2009-08-17T06:52:00.000-07:00

You know you just have to do something about it when...

When it happens slowly inside you.

TIBA-TIBA...BANGSAR BASHING

2009-07-19T19:58:00.000-07:00

Two beautiful single girls seated on a table outside Pelita Bangsar. It was 5 am. They have been sitting ther for almost 6 hours after attending an Art Event launched by U-Wei.

The place was full of people who just finished clubbing.

In front of their table was a group of clubbers, a horny couple was expressing their love towards each other. It made the girl in the colorful striped jacket sick. So she looked to her left and got sicker because a girl on the other table was actually Frenching a guy, her boyfriend maybe, so she looked back at 12 o clock but then there was a couple holding hands. Ok, not too bad she thought.

And then tiba-tiba...

Dashed a nerdy innocent looking Indian guy screaming and shouting at the top of his head. He started pushing the guy whom the girl was Frenching just now.

They were fighting over that girl. Sah sah that nerd guy kena main kayu tiga, kesian dia.

The fight went on and on and on.

The girl in the colored striped shirt felt like saying to the nerd guy " Bunga bukan sekuntum brother...lagipun bunga yang dia fight for tu pun tak la harum sangat pon..kami kan ada."

What a scene.

Rush

2009-07-02T20:41:00.000-07:00

You know, sometimes you look at some photos, and you get this rush.
Some kinda adrenaline rush.
Sometimes a rush of happiness, sometimes a rush of fear.

I sit, I think, I ponder

2009-07-02T19:58:00.000-07:00

There have been many questions still unanswered.
Not everyone agrees on confrontations.
Therefore...

I sit, I think, I ponder.

Life

2009-07-02T19:50:00.000-07:00

Life. Simple for some, complex for some.
Life. It goes on no matter what.
Life. Good things happen, bad things happen.
Life. People come, people go.
Life. We love, we lost.
Life.

At the end of the day, we just have to move on...

Warna

2009-05-26T01:45:00.001-07:00

Muntah, Hijau
Muak, Kuning
Marah, Merah
Dendam, Hitam

Theater

2009-05-26T00:46:00.000-07:00

Life

MUNGKIN

2009-05-16T02:08:00.001-07:00

Mungkin.

CHICKEN

2009-05-16T00:26:00.000-07:00

As much as I love to eat chicken sometimes, be it Kentucky Fried Chicken, or Korean BBQ Chicken, I absolutely cannot stand people who are 'CHICKENS'.

Don't be a chicken, take responsibility, be brave.

If something is wrong, don't be a chicken to correct it.

I'm no CHICKEN.

He's Just Not That Into You

2009-04-12T08:31:00.001-07:00

The movie is out, based on the book.

This post is related to the one below.

When a person is giving busy as an excuse that person is JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU.

A smack of reality, this book is. Can't wait to see the movie.

You gotta be tough enough to read it.

I'm Busy

2009-04-12T07:43:00.000-07:00

If you are really into something or someone, you will somehow find some time to slot in for that person or thing.

" I'm busy" is a typical excuse. You can never be too busy to answer a call, or to even send a nice text to a person if he/she means something to you.

So there.

Anonymous Accounts

2009-04-12T05:53:00.000-07:00

Nope, I'm not talking about bank accounts here. I'm talking about online networking accounts; ie Friendster, Facebook etc2.

A lot of times men and women create different user accounts of Friendster and Facebook etc so that their partners won't come to know about it; so they think.

Usually used as a platform for flirting, dating or finding casual sex; all elements which leads to cheating on the other half.

If it will ruin your relationship with your loved ones,

Why do it?

Issues & Problems

2009-03-19T18:23:00.000-07:00

3 Ways to handle issues & problems:

1. Accept it
2. Avoid or run away from it
3. Solve it

I choose number 3.

Friday The 13th

2009-03-13T21:25:00.001-07:00

Gosh nobody reminded me that it was Friday the 13th yesterday.

Friday the 13th is usually associated to BAD LUCK.

But I felt lucky yesterday.

So is Friday the 13th a myth after all?

When it made me smile

2009-03-13T21:13:00.000-07:00

A lovely Saturday morning

I saw things that I don't usually see

A man holding a guitar with his family, going to perform I presume, I smiled.

A white man with a white kid on his left hand and a black kid on his right in the lift, going for a walk I presume, I smiled.

As I walked out of the lift, a busy man with a laptop sitting on the stairs, his son riding a toy motorbike in front of him, how he tries to balance his work-life and family, I smiled.

Along came a car with well-dressed males looking as if they were ready to perform in a show, I assumed that they were waiting for the man with the guitar upstairs, I smiled.

A couple putting their comforter in their car, ready to head to the laundry I presumed, they looked happy, I smiled.

Everyone was smiling this morning, everyone looked happy.

A lovely Saturday morning, and it made me smile.

Micro-Managing

2009-03-13T02:12:00.000-07:00

Ain't effective. Don't understand why many still do it.

I am..

2009-03-13T01:21:00.000-07:00

Exclusive

Hati

2009-03-09T20:43:00.000-07:00

Terngiang-ngiang kata Robima Malaya: Hati ini milik Tuhan (The heart belongs to GOD)

Fantasy

2009-03-09T20:42:00.000-07:00

Fantasy is an escapism from reality

Almost

2009-03-09T19:39:00.000-07:00

Almost got hit by a bus today whilst walking
Almost hit a car because it emergency braked

Almost.

Burst Button

2009-02-06T00:17:00.003-08:00

There are times when I wish that I can press the Burst Button where it can make me:

1. Spontaneously combust
2. Disappear into thin air
3. Become invisible until I wish to be visible again

or I will be taken to LALALAND.

*Kabommm!*

The Short-Skirt Dilemma

2009-01-28T01:51:00.000-08:00

A conversation with a beloved girlfriend very recently striked the idea of this post. It is about, as the title may suggest, short-skirted girls; zooming in closely on Malay girls especially.

In a typical Malay society, 'short-skirt wearing' girls are pretty much still being judged upon. Deny it or not, like it or not- it's still happening.

Scenario A.

A beautiful woman, dressed in a short skirt with a sexy slit at the back made huge sales at her work place.

The first thing that comes to a typical Malay mind: "Hmpphh..eleh..dia tu..memang la boleh juai benda..dok pi menayang peha betih (betis) sana sini dok pakai skirt pendek yang tak cukup kain tu.."

Reality check: She's a smart woman, whom probably was a nerd in school but happens to have a lot of money to beautify herself with beautiful clothes to enhance her image. However the sales were made based on her skills and intelligence of convincing her customers. No form of flirting, sex, or other nonsense was involved.

Scenario B.

Cik Jah has a son, a graduate who is currently working in a big firm, earning very well and is looking for a suitable candidate to be his loyal and legal wife.

Cik Jah and son is looking out for options so they attend social gatherings, kenduri, parties (parti tupperware kot?) etc2.

Cik Jah met Aunty Liza who has a newly graduated daughter a beautiful single girl named Irina, who sets her dyed hair beautifully and often found to be wearing elegant dresses and short sassy skirts. Aunty Liza and family are Muslims and practices Islam as a way of life (perform prayers, read the Al-Quran, perform Umrah/Hajj etc) only that they are liberal minded and are not strict in terms of dressing or wearing the hijjab/veil. Irina performs her daily prayers without fail, reads the Holy Quran whenever she can, and is a strong believer.

Then along came Cik Kiah who brought her single daughter a Law graduate from International Islamic University named Fatima. Cik Kiah, a very conservative Muslim believes that her daughters should be fully covered up and in no circumstances should they refuse to wear their veils/hijjab. Else they will get into trouble.

In actual fact, Fatima loves wearing skimpy clothes and takes off her veil whenever she can especially when she is out of her parents' sight. Fatima is an alcoholic and goes out drinking every other night, her parents have no idea about this. She only performs her prayers when her parents forces her to, she is not a strong believer.

Question: Whom will Cik Jah and bachelor son perceive as to be the most suitable candidate to be the future wife for her beloved son?

Answer: Of course Cik Jah and son saw Fatima as the most suitable candidate to become a wife. (No guesses lah, that wasn't hard was it?)

No matter how good we girls are, and no matter how strong our beliefs are,even if we pray and we don't drink etc. as long as we are wearing our short skirts, we will not be seen as a 'wife material', and will always be the girl in the short skirt. (According to the typical Malay perspective).

But being a hypocrite is worse than wearing a short skirt..SO yes girlfriends..let's go shopping for more short skirts!

Jom beli skirt pendek banyak-banyak! :) Yeay!

Insomniac Ideas

2009-01-17T10:53:00.000-08:00

When you want to sleep but you can't, the best thing to do is write.

You will never know whether someone really loves you or not.

Answers come without us having to look for it.

I love cooking, and I cook for the people that I love. But cooking chicken and mashed potatoes will make my heart bleed, don't ask me why.

Honesty hurts when it is not returned.

Loyalty hurts when it is not returned.

I believe in monogamy.

Infidelity is unacceptable.

Rainbows and clouds are pretty. It makes me smile.

Heartaches make you numb.

I will never eat rabbits. They are too cute to be eaten. But cooking rabbits won't make my heart bleed.

I am sleepy now. Knew that would do it.

Peculiar Dream No. 2

2009-01-04T05:17:00.000-08:00

This dream happened about 2 nights ago, I think. It was somewhat dark and creepy.

There was a man, very good looking, tall, and had long silky hair up to his neck. He was my leader. I remembered being a very loyal assistant to this man.

He went around, biting and slaughtering living creatures for a purpose. Not to kill, but for them to be as how they were, only more beautiful.

You are not to fight nor retaliate. If you disturb the process, you will turn into an ugly beast, a horrid looking creature and will remain like that forever.

The first, he slaughtered an old lady, but she retaliated and ran away. She remained living as an ugly beast.

Of course in the process of slaughtering and being beautiful, each creature has to go through a phase where they turn ugly.

The second was a fox. The fox barely fought- he turned into a nice golden brown fox, even more beautiful than before.

The man and I went into a hospital, looking for more creatures to be turned into our followers, to cure them our way.

The hospital was an old English building, very British and grey.

It was a gloomy grey winter weather.

What a dream.

Peculiar Dream No. 1

2009-01-01T16:51:00.000-08:00

This dream was a while back, it was last year but I was busy with theater I did not get a chance to write about it.

I was wearing white, and so was the rest of my people. We were all dressed in Roman Greek attire, white cloths that we wore as robes.

We were in a huge mansion, very royal, the interior was a cross of Roman, Greek and Egyptian.
There were many of us and I remembered holding a sword. We were laughing, eating grapes, some of us were talking, the children playing games with each other.

When suddenly the main door opened, and came in a troop of Egyptians dressed in black robes, each had straight slick Cleopatra hair, black thick eyebrows and eyes painted with shining black mascara.

The black-robed Egyptians were holding a shining gold sword each, all aiming to attack my people.

It all happened so fast, and the last thing I remembered was I was the only white-robed person left, tired from fighting but still standing strong holding my sword.

The Egyptians stared at me, and realizing this I ran as fast as I could towards the garden where my people were kept in captive in beautiful white tents made of glass and wood.
I unlocked the door and freed my people. I did not even realize that I fought till we won the war.

The Egyptians fled and then I woke up, feeling really tired and confused.

What a dream, and no I did not watch any sort of movies or read anything war or warrior related before that.

So yeah I'm still wondering what it means.

Sepandai-pandai Tupai Melompat

2008-12-22T01:07:00.000-08:00

Humans naturally have the urge and desire to do something thrilling. Something which gives them the adrenaline rush, the sort of satisfaction that you get when you do something forbidden.

But as humans, we must also remember that this world is not ours, and we are not in control of it. Always think before you act upon something and remember that as much as you would like to hide your vices, which may be thrilling and fun to you; God and the universe has the power to turn your world and lives around.

To that certain someone, if you read this article I hope you have learnt your lesson. I hope you do realize that what you did was wrong; be it the intention, or the act of doing; no matter how you hard you try to justify the reasons, it is STILL WRONG.

If you haven't learnt your lesson, I hope one day you will, and I hope you will change for good.

Ingatlah, sepandai-pandai tupai melompat, akhirnya jatuh ke tanah jua.

And if you think you are the smartest tupai, remember that there are always other tupais who are smarter than you, and also the one writing happens to be one.

*Disclaimer: Tupai is a malay word for squirrel.

True Colors

2008-11-30T17:07:00.000-08:00

It's amazing how only certain people can see your true colours and vice versa.
You tend to show your true colours to the people you feel most comfortable with.
Sometimes you spontaneously over react, and you feel guilty after.

I Wait

2008-11-26T23:42:00.000-08:00

I sit, I wait.
I do my work, and I still wait.
I go to lunch and chat with friends, and then I wait.
I sing, I act, I dance, I wait.
I pray, and I still wait.
I live my life but still I wait.
I wonder why I still do wait.
I wonder whether it is worth the wait.
I wait, I wait and I wait.

Am I waiting for nothing?

Breathe

2008-11-26T18:38:00.000-08:00

I have a reason to be relaxed.

I have a reason to take life easy.

I have a reason to chill.

I have a reason to breathe.

Although I have to forgo my many pleasures, at least I have a reason to move at my own pace.

Tok Man

2008-11-23T19:06:00.000-08:00

He is my neighbour, apparently. People have been telling me about him but I did not pay any attention. I have been avoiding the neighbours on purpose. Then one day, when my friends were visiting, I saw this man with this freaking weird hair standing between the doors of my condo unit and his, so I was forced to smile and say hi. Simple huge ugly t-shirt and a pair of washed out khakis with freaking weird hair, he appeared to be a chubby man and very friendly indeed. He looked absolutely straight, except that his weird hair which turned out to be a wig made me wonder of his sexuality.
He invited me into his unit and reluctantly I entered.
His home was full of striking flowers on trays, apparently he makes trays for 'hantaran' for Malay Weddings. His taste was unlike mine,I thought but it's not like I was going to ask him to make any for myself.
He started talking to me, and I looked around the white walls of his unit. Huge weird ugly wigs were hanging on the white walls of his unit.
That was when I figured that he was gay.
After a short conversation, I asked him his name. He introduced himself as 'Tok Man'.
Oh, so this was the popular Tok Man people have been talking about. Apparently he is famous for his job.
I smiled half heartedly, said a short "Nice to meet you" and bid goodbye.

The above was what I dreamt of last night. Weird. Tok Man?

Nerakahell

2008-11-16T18:25:00.000-08:00

They defined it as "Neraka adalah orang lain". I gave it a thought. But after thinking, most of the time, " Neraka adalah diri sendiri".

Think about it.

PeNaTiReD

2008-11-13T23:54:00.000-08:00

Penat. Tired. Penat.

Apabila kita tidak berjaya bertemu di tengah-tengah, kita sebenarnya menemui Jalan Mati.

(Baik Mati Sajor!)

The Checklist

2008-11-13T23:21:00.000-08:00

Every girl has it, whether they are aware of it or not.
Every girl has it, it's just a matter whether they write it down, or have it in their heads.
I have it, and I stick to it, no compromise.
Unless there's a really good deal to un-check any of the items on the list.
Otherwise a checklist is a checklist.
It's MY checklist and yes so far, I'm sticking to it.
And yes, I'm very specific when it comes to the items on the list.
Not easy to find the right deal with my checklist.

Honestly I think my checklist is very simple, just like me. (I can see my friends rolling their eyes on this one).

Untitled

2008-11-07T04:14:00.000-08:00

There are times that I want to talk to you, but I can't
There are times that I want to be with you, but I can't
There are Friday nights that I wish we'd to go out, but I can't because U can't,
There are times that I want to share exploding news, but I can't.

I am a woman with an inquisitive mind,
I shall question when I want to
I shall not be told not to ask
As that challenges my credibility
I will ask what, when and who
And no one, can ever stop me.

To live in this world is an opportunity
For us to learn, to give, and take
Some words you say may really hurt me
And a woman's heart will easily ache.

I am a woman with dignity
Every woman deserves to be respected
Spread love and humanity
May I, woman achieve dreams desired.

DEAR GOD

2008-10-25T14:52:00.001-07:00

Dear God,

Please help me. I have a boyfriend and I have been so loyal to him but he doesn't believe me. He questions my loyalty and I know he doesn't believe in me nor trust me.

Dear God,

Please help me tell him how much I wished that we could spend 24 hours together.

Dear God,

Please help me inform him how much I wished that he could share the things I love to do together.

Dear God,

Help me convince him that my love for him is very pure, that I have nothing to hide.

Dear God,

I always hope you will be on my side. I do not want to lose the person I love again.

Dear God,

Please let him know how difficult it is for me to sleep when he ignores me, how I can't stop thinking about resolving our issues and how to make him feel better.

Dear God,

Help me tell him how much I cherish our relationship that I would do whatever it takes not to jeopardize this precious thing we have between us.

Dear God,

Please also tell him how hard it is for me to be a secret lover, a secret kept from his friends.

Dear God,

I hate myself for loving him too much. Please tell him that too.

Dear God,

I pray that things would work out between us.

Depression

2008-10-21T04:32:00.001-07:00

www.depression.com

Y.A.F.I

2008-10-21T04:25:00.001-07:00

You asked for it.

FAR

2008-10-20T02:30:00.001-07:00

I am far far away